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KARWACHAUTH: CELEBRATING FOOLISHNESS-SINCE MEDIAEVAL TIMES

“Stay hungry, stay foolish.” Steve Jobs said these iconic words in 2005, and the world was awed. Little did they know that we Indians have been doing this since generations, we even have a name for it “Kawachauth”. 

Okay it is that time of the year again, when my wife and I have heated debates about the “holy” question if she should starve herself for my long life. My answer is always a firm NO.

However, she gets all teary eyed and superstitious and blames me making fun of “sacred occasion.” I point out that SACRED AND SCARED have the same spelling and this is a conspiracy of scaring women. However, this only adds fuel to the fire, and as usual, as a good husband, I have to admit defeat and allow her to happily starve herself for one day.

But now that I have turned an astrologer, I have an ace up my sleeve, and this time, I launched a parting shot:  “I know more about Moon than your mother, grandmother, and mother-in-law combined. Moon is the karaka of motherhood and not marriage. You ladies got the wrong planet…! 

But no matter who you are, an astrologer, or a president, if your wife wants to torture herself, she will. There is nothing you can do, but see her starve.  

Technically, this fast is supposed to increase my life span, in reality, my BP rages with helpless anger and irritation the entire day. So much for my health.

We Indians are mostly a scared, illogical, and superstitious lot. We have ruined every great ancient thing from education system to economics. However, we have done maximum damage to the institution of marriage. 

Look what we got: 

  1. Arranged Marriages: Family approved “sex for money” arrangement. No wonder they call it “arranged”. Have you ever read the newspaper ads, “tall slim fair girl” for “well settled boy with package of at least 10 Lac”.  I rest my case. 

  1. Costly weddings: Which brings us nothing but debts, poverty, female infanticide, drunk fights, and a few angry relatives. In every wedding I want to yell out: SAVE THAT MONEY AND GIVE IT TO YOUR NEWLY WEDDED CHILDREN, YOU OLD FOOLS…! In one night the parents blow millions, and the wedded couple pays housing loan for next 20 years. If self-destructive foolishness had a picture, it would be that of a big fat Indian wedding.   

3. Silly customs like “Karwachauth”

On top of all that foolishness, add the brainwashing machine known as “movies and media” and you have a nation blinded by superstitions and foolish customs. You have marriages glorifying costly weddings and adding few more silly customs, as if that is exactly what the nation needs. 

You have the movie’s hero romantically giving water to his beloved wife, encouraging couples to follow their lead. 

Even worse are, the abysmally low-IQ soap operas, I bet almost all would have a Karwachauth special episode this week, and while all would have the romantic glass of water, many would show how a woman’s fast was broken or her lamp extinguished and, boom her husband met with an accident….! 

This makes me want to grab my baseball bat and rush to the studio. 

Here I bring LOGIC: Western counties have much better life expectancy, and Japan has the highest. Guess they haven’t even heard about the concept of Karwachauth. I am sure we all know at least one young widow who fasted without any miss, what happened there? For the record, India  ranks 125 in terms of life expectancy. Lower than Cambodia, Mongolia even Bangladesh…!

For anyone who accuses me of making fun of this ancient custom, here is my reply: this “ancient” custom is not even ancient. There are no stories of Sita or Rukmani keeping this fast. As if they were bad wives and their husbands did not last long. 

Like most things evil, this fast is a MEDIAEVAL (have you ever noticed MEDIAEVAL has MAD and EVIL hidden in it). It is a mad-evil patriarchal plot for subjugation of women. And like most things in Indian marriages, this backfired on men.  

The wife fasts for the husband and touches his feet, as if she is the slave who lives under the holy feet of her lord and master, her husband. In reality it is the husband who is under her thumb. 

The clownish men are called “pati dev” (the husband god) , “swami” (the master) and “parana naath” (the lord of life). Whereas reality is that SHE is the ruling goddess 364 days of the year, SHE is the real master of the house and the husband’s “Prana” fluctuates with the tip of her tongue.

 

LADIES: Let me stick my neck out and say Karwachauth is foolish…! it has no scientific, spiritual, or astrological basis. 

Self torture won’t increase your husband’s life span; peace, harmony, and love would. If you want your husband to live longer, stop nagging and fighting him (and especially his mother).

 By the way heart disease is the biggest killer of modern Indian men, and stress from marriage is a big reason for his heart going weak. 

Observe a “NO-FIGH FAST” for a few days or may be a “NO-NAGGING NOVEMBER”. Trust me, that would add years to your man’s life.

Do keep the fast if you still want, but  don’t compromise on your health, if you feel weak or dizzy have some liquids, especially juices, tea etc. No it won’t kill your man. 

GENTLEMEN: If she still wants to starve herself, there is very little you can do, but at least ask her to take some relaxations. Encourage her to have a cup of tea or juice in the afternoon. No that’ won’t kill you. 

See if you can stop your children from following this foolishness.

God Bless,

G. Vijay Kumar 

Images: Google

PS: My wife hates me for this article. Can’t even imagine showing this to my mother. 

27 Comments on “KARWACHAUTH: CELEBRATING FOOLISHNESS-SINCE MEDIAEVAL TIMES

  1. this sooo on point. But when you tell all this logic to anyone they give that dirty look as if you have committed some henious crime. Its good to finally find out an astrologer who is very logical too and I am very much looking forward to the consultation which is in few days.

  2. Dear Sir,
    In the article there lies two principal critique of the fast; First, non-existence of any historical (puranic) refrence and Second the logic of this fasting itself ultimately labelling it patriarchal.

    On the first issue, there have been mentions of Draupadi keeping the same for Arjuna. And even so if it is medevial. Everything which is medieval doesn’t make it wrong. (Keeping it short as I believe traditions are much beyond text and Hindu religion not just confined to Sita, Draupadi and Rukmani)

    On logic of fasting, In the hindu pantheon, patanjalI mentions in his Ashtanga yoga about Prtyahaar which is to have control over the senses which includes fasting. It brings one close to divinity. And when bhakti,/love meet yoga it emerges as vrat with a wish for long life of husband from divine.

    On astrological question, the principal deity of the fast is Shiva and not Moon. Moonrise only mark end of the fast.

    Finally, feminism is not about going to the most rational ways. . . . But it is to respect the choices of women with dignity.

  3. Dear Sir,
    In the article there lies two principal critique of the fast; First, non-existence of any historical (puranic) refrence and Second the logic of this fasting itself ultimately labelling it patriarchal.

    On the first issue, there have been mentions of Draupadi keeping the same for Arjuna. And even it is not so ancient but medevial does not necessarily make it devoid of Hindu traditions. Ramcharimanas is medevial. (Keeping it short as I believe traditions are much beyond text and Hindu religion not just confined to Sita, Draupadi and Rukmani )

    On logic of fasting, In the hindu pantheon, patanjalI mentions in his Ashtanga yoga about Prtyahaar which is to have control over the senses which includes fasting. It brings one close to divinity. And when bhakti/love meet yoga it emerges as vrat with a wish for long life of husband from divine. (Nothing wrong, right.??)

    On the astrological issue with the fast, the deity to be worshipped is Shiva and not Moot. Moonrise only mark end of the fast.

    Finally, feminism is not about going to the most rational ways. . It is respecting the choice of the women with dignity. 🙂

    1. 2 things here:

      1. There is NO mention of Draupadi keeping this vrat in all 4 versions of Mahabharata that i read (including one by KM Ganguly which is the most detailed version). DON’T TRUST EVEYRTHING YOU READ ON THE INTERNET…ESP FROM HINDI SITES.

      2. Fasting is good…i am all for it…but it should be MY choice and not someone else’s compulsion. Also vrat without water is too harsh for a normal woman

      3. Praying to Shiva is great. I have writeen an entire article on marrieage and shiva. However, when we worship the planet…we worship the planet. Moon is not related to marriage

      hope this makes my pint clear

  4. The best takeaway from this post – no matter who you are, you WILL ultimately bow before your wife’s will. All men are lions, but below Maa Durga’s feet !!!

        1. Just saw the comment. According to the Tantras, a part of every man is female and a part of every woman is male. It is like a continuum. In the same Markandey Purana, you will find the assertion that Shakti was born out of Shiva and also the hymns in praise of Shakti that hail her as the cause of everything.

          Our smallness lies in thinking that human females only are manifestations of Shakti.

          Whereas completely devoted male devotees of Shakti can be more in tune with the feminine energy rather than the worldly souls merely having physical body of female.

          Practically also, if I worship any random female as a form of the Divine Mother, will it lead to fulfilment of my wish? Highly unlikely.

          Even in Kumari or Kanya Puja, the Mother Divine has to be first invoked or installed within the girls by mantras just like before ritual worship of any other deity we have to invoke them within ourselves before starting the ritual worship.

          I am sorry for pestering you like this as you are much elder to me but I am speaking from my own experience and have full faith in it.

    1. i have no idea, but I am a Sai Bhakta and follow Baba on things where my understanding is limited. Baba was AGAINST all kinds of fasting. So no fast is a good fast for me. One should at least have fruits and juices.

  5. In those days the life of a woman, economically, socially, and pratically in all matters, depended on her husband. Widows could not remarry. Plus, the plethora of wars and violent crimes like banditry meant that the death rate of males was higher than their replacement rate. Hence the tradition of Karwa Chauth was born to at least give some peace to the minds of women whose worst nightmare was losing their place in society if they lost their husband. This practice outlived its relevance long ago.

  6. So many well educated women do it in current times..it is more of dressing up festival and kind of hyped up festival because of movies…depiction of romance etc etc. And also women tend to be followers in a group so if group of women are doing it others like to join rather raise voice.

    1. Believing what movies show as true is one of the root causes of divorces and domestic acrimony nowadays in India in my humble opinion. Women want husbands like movie heroes and men want wives like movie heroines. Nobody wants to take responsibility of domestic affairs and old parents because in the movies, a love affair is always between two people. Domestic and family responsibilty is out of movies’ syllabus hence the same for husband and wife too.

  7. How do you do that ??!!!
    Its so natural to get absorbed in what you write, the way you write and what you choose to write about…
    I read you for the sheer pleasure of reading..
    Sometimes keeping the astrology aside..
    Great fan of yours..

  8. Brilliant post and excellent logic. The Marxists say Religion is the Opium of the masses. In today’s India it is the awful TV serials and “family” soap operas which have become the nauseating opium of the masses.

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